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babydoll I like it here!
Joined: 23 Aug 2006 Posts: 57 Location: Essex
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Posted: Tue Sep 12, 2006 5:33 pm Post subject: Help! |
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Right - I feel bad, but not sure. Oh god. I duno. Right.
I've got a boyfriend - Trev. But a few weeks ago I met someone in Dukes (club in Chelmsford) and we've been meeting up almost everyday since then - chilling out, spending time with each other - and we've become really good mates really quickly. Not a bad thing. He's my guardian angel and will drop anything to make sure I'm ok. Last night I rung him at 2am from uni in Greenwich because I was ill, 45 minutes later he's banging on my door. He had to go to work at 6am and he came to London from Essex to make sure I was ok. He really would do anything for me which I really appreciate. He's recently finished with his girlfriend of 2 years because he just couldn't stand her anymore. We went clubbing in Bakers bar on Friday in Southend and he said to me "you know, in 10 years, if neither of us have found someone, you and me will get married yea?" but then last night - he said "I don't think I could ever wait 10 years for you, I swear you'll be snapped up way before then"
I'm really falling for him, he's so lovely and caring etc. He doesn't want a relationship now but I'd drop anything to be with him. But I also really like Trev. What shall I do?  _________________
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Tobes Special friend of Hayley Ann

Joined: 30 Oct 2005 Posts: 920
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Posted: Tue Sep 12, 2006 5:59 pm Post subject: |
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My view is go and be happy, if you're not happy then the world is a much sadder place to be. I am a great believer of it is better to regret something you have done than something you haven't.
Good luck with whatever you decide  |
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Graz One of Hayley's boys!

Joined: 11 Dec 2005 Posts: 639 Location: Portsmouth
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Posted: Wed Sep 13, 2006 8:15 pm Post subject: |
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I never like that whole 'if we not married in 10 years' thing... if you like someone enough to say that now, then why wait (i not say marry him, but be with him!) _________________ Don't do anything I wouldn't do!
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EssexLad Dr H. Amster

Joined: 22 Nov 2005 Posts: 616
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Posted: Thu Sep 14, 2006 11:08 am Post subject: |
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i think the guys are spot on ...
lifes too short to regret what might have been.
You say you like your current bf but maybe you dont like him as much as you think you do ... if the new guy is in ya mind.
He seems to really like you , so best thing would be to go for it.
But ya owe ya bf respect not to do anything until ya make up ya mind IMO.
in situations like this best to follow ya heart  |
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Thomas E. Johnson x I worship Hayley Ann x

Joined: 08 Feb 2006 Posts: 1044 Location: The Home Of Uncle Sam
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Posted: Thu Sep 14, 2006 8:07 pm Post subject: |
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Essexlad is correct. Follow your heart, but you must be mindful of your current b/f's feelings. _________________ Thomas E. Johnson
Keeper Of All Knowledge
Star Trek Fan And Proud Of It
Expert On Naval And Maritime History
Admiral Of The Fleet |
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lush_lulu x Model Friend x
Joined: 17 Nov 2005 Posts: 168
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Posted: Thu Sep 14, 2006 10:38 pm Post subject: |
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Aw well i guess you need to take a bit of time out n decide what it is exactly that u want. Don't do anything that you're gonna regret later on.
but if you're feeling this way, it could just be a sign u and your bf aren't meant to be. This new guy may be the 1 for u or he may not, u don't know until you try but maybe be single for a bit n don't go from 1 relationship into another.
Totally changing the subject, i was in southend on fri, woo! _________________
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dave aka phoenix x Ultimate Hayley Fan x

Joined: 02 Apr 2006 Posts: 654 Location: Canterbury
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Posted: Fri Sep 15, 2006 9:26 am Post subject: |
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Think most of the guys like Essexlad, Tobes and Lulu (even though she's not a guy) have all been spot on - follow your heart, it might because he's making efforts that you appreciate more than you're bf, that a friend like that is caring enough to do it and because you may not be to use to it, you're liking what's happening. You could be feeling strong as a fond friend for the other guy because he'll make sacrifices.
But in the end, if you feel strong with your bf, then stay with him, if not then it's time to part ways. But if that option was taken, be wary incase this guy still doesn't want a relationship and you lost your current bf for nothing - make sure you're heart and mind are at one for all this _________________
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Terry Funny Little Nana

Joined: 25 Oct 2005 Posts: 700
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Posted: Wed Sep 27, 2006 11:56 pm Post subject: |
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what did u deciced? _________________
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Mark Dr Mark

Joined: 01 Nov 2005 Posts: 294 Location: Lincoln
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Posted: Sun Oct 01, 2006 11:56 am Post subject: |
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I'm gonna give some advice that i don't think anyone mentioned...
if you're seriously thinking about switching to a new guy, it seems obvious to me that you and the old one aren't working/meant to be. So the choice to me seems to be whether to get with the new guy, or just be single. The old guy -- trev -- is completely out of the equation, you might have liked him at first and are probably quite fond of him now, but it'd be cruel to stay with him if he's not the only one you want. |
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the-smithmyster The one & only 'Edd' Pickled Onion King

Joined: 24 Nov 2005 Posts: 885 Location: Hertford Hertfordshire & City of London
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Posted: Sun Oct 01, 2006 2:51 pm Post subject: |
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Dont want to put a spanner in the works, but you cant have you cake and eat it.
Trev should be getting all the attenion your giving the other fella. Sometimes the grass looks greener on the otherside, but its always through rose tinted glasses in these situations. The new and exciting thing.
Dont get me wrong, im all for to following your heart, but the Hearts always easily fooled and has a clouded judgment, the Heart always thinks of the now and it's self and not the feelings of other people involved.
If your enjoying this other guys company better than your BF its wrong to keep doing it with out making a decision, weather you cant see the answer or not. Only you can make the choice and you have to do it!
Think if you found out after 6 months this new bloke had been spending loads of time and giving his attentions to another girl instead of you. _________________ "The world is full of magic can't you see, I'm your guardian angel, trust in me"
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Lady G I like it here!
Joined: 02 Sep 2006 Posts: 79 Location: good ole pompey B)
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Posted: Sun Oct 01, 2006 4:32 pm Post subject: |
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well yes if you're even thinking about leavin ur bf for another bloke, then there's obviously something behind it. i was in similar situation a few weeks ago, but i love my bf, and it's ok
just take ur time to find out what you really want, and then make a move... cause if you break up with the bf, and then realise you didn't want to, it could be hard to get back together.
good luck x |
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the-smithmyster The one & only 'Edd' Pickled Onion King

Joined: 24 Nov 2005 Posts: 885 Location: Hertford Hertfordshire & City of London
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Posted: Sun Oct 01, 2006 5:00 pm Post subject: |
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| Lady G wrote: | well yes if you're even thinking about leavin ur bf for another bloke, then there's obviously something behind it. i was in similar situation a few weeks ago, but i love my bf, and it's ok
just take ur time to find out what you really want, and then make a move... cause if you break up with the bf, and then realise you didn't want to, it could be hard to get back together.
good luck x |
It would be WRONG getting back!! _________________ "The world is full of magic can't you see, I'm your guardian angel, trust in me"
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